The other day I was hanging out with my neighbor Lu who has a 10 year old daughter, Nicky. Nicky has a 12 year old friend named Helen who's mother's name is Mimi. Both girls are a little on the heavy side but not out of control. Lu has instilled a positive body image into Nicky but Mimi keeps telling Helen how "fat" she is and says "you need lose weight" in front of everyone while we are hanging out.
After further discussions, I discovered that the negative comments stem from Mimi's husband. Mimi is of Korean decent and weighs about 120 lbs soaking wet. She is not EVEN slightly overweight but her husband says to her "You too fat!" and so she is passing on this negative mindset to Helen. It makes me
Hoping to get out to the gym today! Otherwise it is a get organized kinda day. Until next time...
Yes, it's never good to hear that kind of thing. I am a parent -- and when my 11-12-year-old was looking a little heavy, my doctor made sure to point out (without my even addressing the issue) that that's really typical of that age, that they shoot up and slim down.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree. The times I have been fat, my mom never told me I was fat, but I saw how she treated herself and was always on some diet or another and just that fact passed the poor body image on to me. Even when I was 140 pounds in high school and tiny, I thought I was fat. Boy I could kick the crap out of that girl now, and would give my let pinky for that body.
ReplyDeletePolar's Mom
www.polarspage.blogspot.com
Katie, Can you speak/write Korean? Deb
ReplyDeleteIt might be a cultural thing tbh, I'm Asian and my family was always on my back to lose weight when I was 130 lb, in China random strangers kept scolding me and giving me diet advice . Most Asians are pretty thin and very fat-phobic so that puts much more pressure on those who aren't naturally that way, because we're not allowed to be "like those white people".
ReplyDeleteAt 115 lbs and a size 4 my parents still call me 'fatty' 'piggy' etc and I'm the fattest of my (constantly-dieting) Asian friends. I don't think parents should be passing on such bad body image issues, but even you don't say anything kids will pick up these things from school, from friends, classmates, the media etc. I hate to think it, but it is almost impossible to achieve a healthy body image these days. :(
Best of luck with your goals!
I agree with you. That is just terrible. That girl will have emotional problems all of her life!
ReplyDeleteThat makes me so sad. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make self acceptance the "norm" not the exception!!
ReplyDeletehow sad. i have a girlfriend whose mother weighed her every single day. fast forward a generation and now she's equally controlling of what her children eat. every time mom is out of sight, her daughters binge to the point of desperation. i'm worried for them. it's about balance. kwim?
ReplyDeletelate to this but chiming in none the less.
ReplyDeleteI can only HOPE HOPE HOPE theres some quirky cultural thing we are missing :(
MizFit
That breaks my heart to hear... :(
ReplyDelete